Monday, April 20, 2009

Dearest Ones, This is a Very Important Message

Why, telemarketers? Why? Do you think that robo-calls are an effective marketing technique? Do you not realize that as soon as I hear the words "this is an important message", I will immediately mutter "not important enough for me to listen to" as I'm hanging up the phone? And for those of you whose auto-dial systems are slow on the uptake? I'm hanging up before the recording even starts. I say "hello?" and you have ONE SECOND to respond. So, really? Why bother? I'm not listening to the recording. I'm not holding on for a representative. And if you get my answering machine, I'm erasing the message the moment is starts to play, so I won't even know what company you're calling from.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a number of emails to attend to. Very important overseas business. Surely, a correspondent whose message begins with the words "Dearest in Christ" cannot be anything but sincere.

10 comments:

Gifted Typist said...

Ah, one of my hobby horses.
the robo-calls, as you aptly call them, are a case of people being sold a technology without a human context. Everyone hangs up.

And the more than one second thing?
The auto-diallers dial 10 #s at a time and talk to the first who answers.

opt-out lists and call display are your best counter-weapons in this game.

Lisa said...

You crack me up, too. I don't get this annoying system. How can it possibly work?

We even get these calls at the office. I cannot tell you the number of "last offer" calls we've gotten on the warranty for my boss's corporate car.

Dusty said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

God I hate spammers and telemarketers. At our abode, we tell them to hold for a minute and put the phone down and forget about it. Is that mean? ;)

BeckEye said...

I'd like to meet the people who actually do hold on for that call. And kick them all in the shins.

Suze said...

The telemarketers must think I'm the crappiest drive that drives a really crappy car. They keep wanting to sell me insurance. Ugh!

Steve said...

that's why my home phone is unplugged
only have it to access the innertubes

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

I feckin' hate robo telemarketing calls. As soon as I hear that silence after I say "Hello," I hang up.

dguzman said...

I've often wondered why companies continue to do robo-calls. I mean, does ANYONE hold and wait for a representative, or wait to hear an important message, or whatever other bullshit these things do?

It seems like the companies that offer robo-calls as a service are making money for doing nothing.

CDP said...

GT--I also think that the delay thing was OK years ago before people were on to them...you'd stand there and say "hello? hello?" Now, God forbid that it's an actual person who's having physical difficulty and they just can't speak because we're all hanging up instantly.

Lisa--I always wonder "does anyone actually respond to this tactic by saying 'sure! I'd LOVE to purchase an extended warranty!'"

Dusty--no, it's AWESOME.

Beckeye--I know--enablers, all of them!

Suze--I keep getting timeshare calls.

Steve--Good idea!

Dr. M--me too, so sorry to anyone who was just momentarily choking or coughing.

DG--I know, I wonder why the companies haven't gotten that people are on to them and that this tactic cannot possibly work.

Sauntering Soul said...

I was in the middle of teaching a painting class at the studio last Saturday and the Atlanta newspaper called to offer a subscription. At least it was an actual human, but it was still annoying to have to interrupt a painting class to answer their stupid, annoying call. Why would anyone want their paper when we can read it for free online anyway?

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